Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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