help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
