i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
