i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
