he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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