i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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