spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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