omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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