We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Bring me that man meat
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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