god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
