based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
