you guys were way drunker than both of me
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
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