Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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