Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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