i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
