If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
