So drunk its hurt
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
