pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize