umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
