So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize