Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
im calling her cock vulture from now on
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
