Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
