So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
