I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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