his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize