I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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