just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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