drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
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