Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
