Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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