It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
