Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize
