I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
My vagina is very pro this idea
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
