I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
