Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Randomize
