So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
