Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize
