Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
