well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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