Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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