FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize
