North Korea, Best Korea!
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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