I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
