And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
