your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
