He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Randomize
