a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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