He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
