vagina is talking i cant
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
