At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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